Chained to Christ

I recently went to a women’s Christian conference. This was my third year going and I am always impressed with the worship, speakers, and the feeling I leave with. The entire weekend is focused on empowering women and encouraging them to step-up and out in their faith and walk with God. I never leave the conference feeling anything less than filled and bubbling over with motivation to improve my relationship with Christ. This year things were so much different for me. Instead of leaving with a spiritual high that would fade and a devotion book that I would stop writing in two weeks after, I walked out the doors of that conference center broken, convicted, and ready to make a radical change in my life and spiritual relationship.

At the conference, I felt as though every speaker and song was directed right at me. It wasn’t the music. Because it isn’t music that moves you as a Christian, it is the worship you put behind it. It wasn’t the spiritual pep-talks, anyone can listen and be convicted. It was God. I walked in those doors knowing something was wrong, ignoring the fact that I wasn’t where I needed to be in my walk with Christ.  This isn’t to say that I don’t pray, consult Jesus in every decision, or try to live faithfully to him daily. But it does mean that I knew in my heart that I had been putting things before God. I have been struggling silently with the idols of my life and I have let myself worship thoughts, desires, fears, and insecurities. ANYTHING you think about, want, love, and give your time to more than God is an IDOL. And I was quickly learning that I had quite a few.

When you realize that you are not where you should be, that you are confined to the world and it’s sin, and that God is BEGGING you to come back to him, you can do one of two things. You can choose to be the same person; put on the Christian smile and continue to talk about the marvelous God and His eternal love that you aren’t even acknowledging daily. OR you can change. Anyone who has grown up in church and read the bible can pretend to know what Holy is and recite the stories we have all heard. But it takes true brokenness to feel the longing God has for His children. It takes ultimate submission to decide that you want to run to Jesus instead of the things that keep you from him.

Romans 6:18 says “Being then made free from sin, you became the servants of righteousness.”
and Romans 6:22 tells us “But now that you have been set free from sin and have become slaves to God, the benefit you reap leads to holiness, and the result is eternal life.”

Whether I had realized it or not, I had become a slave to my own sin. I was serving the world and had chained myself to the cuffs of all the things my God could set me free from. For the first time I can honestly say I experienced God breaking my heart for all the things that had been breaking His.

After the conference I wrote this:

I don’t want to be bound to anyone or anything but you, Lord. I don’t want to be chained to the world, to selfishness, to a need, want, man, or idol. I don’t want to be chained to the person I pretend to be, but rather to the woman you created me to become. I don’t want to be chained to my guilt, shame, doubts, or my self-worth issues. I don’t want to be chained to a loss of innocence, or desperation to get it back. I don’t want to be chained to my strife, to the battles I have had to fight, my pain, or the resentment in my heart. I don’t want to be chained to my mistakes or the mistakes others have committed against me. Amen.

And with that, God broke my chains. I now know that a servant is someone who is bound by obligation and against their will. A bondservant is someone who was once a slave, but was set free and chose to stay because of their love and dedication to their master.

I might have been a slave to sin, but now I am a bondservant to Jesus Christ. I am not with Him against my will, but because I am hungry for His word, for His approval, and for the love that ONLY He can fill all my voids with. I am no longer a slave to sin or a religion, but a bondservant to God’s love.

“He brought them out of darkness and the deepest gloom and broke away their chains.”
Psalm 107:14

-Madalyn Payge <3

Dating Jesus

By definition, Lent is the time of preparation for Holy Week, leading up to Easter. It is practiced mostly by Catholics, but I’ll admit that I just love the idea of it. For forty days, those that practice Lent fast from something. I have decided that I’ll participate in the Lent tradition this year. Instead of giving up something I had planned on going without anyways (like soda or television) I am going to give up something that I think takes up a lot of my time and replace the time I would have spent on that one thing with praying and spending “quiet time” with God.  My goal is to use this season of Lent as a time of for me to grow nearer to God. We never need an excuse to better our spiritual relationships, but I’m excited to give up something to have time with God, since Jesus gave up His life to have eternity with us.

Let me preface this next paragraph by saying that I am totally aware of how ridiculous I am. And yes, I know I’m only eighteen and have a whole life ahead of me and shouldn’t wish my days away. But I can’t really change how my thought processes are and who I am at my core. Those that really know me will think my Lent sacrifice is exactly what I need and will probably get a good kick out of it too :)

For Lent, I’m giving up the thought of marriage. This isn’t to say I plan to never get married or that I am abandoning all hope to get married, but if I’m honest with myself about what takes up a lot of my time, it’s some form of the thought of marriage. When I meet a guy, I immediately identify them as “marriage material” or not. I can’t help it! It’s not that I want to get married RIGHT NOW, but I am definitely ready to meet someone. And because I don’t date without a purpose, or date someone who doesn’t have the characteristics I would want in a husband, marriage just tends to always be on my mind.

One day my friend asked me “Why do you insist on wearing makeup and fixing your hair before always going out?” I tried to make it a joke by saying, “Because every day is a potential day to meet my husband for the first time.” The more I thought about my “joking” response, the more I realized how serious I was. 

If I replace the time I spend fantasizing over something I can’t magically make appear- like a boyfriend or future husband- with time with God, I have no doubt that I’d make so much spiritual progress. The bible says that God is supposed to be our portion for everything we need, that we’re supposed to turn to HIM. God gives us what we need when we need it, I really do believe that. So if I started practicing it, I know that my faith in God and His faithfulness to me will feel more secure.  Therefore, every time a boyfriend-marriage-family related thought pops in my head, I will immediately pray and spend time in God’s Word instead. I know that as a young girl, the priority shouldn’t be finding a husband, but rather preparing myself to be the Godly woman and wife I’ve been called to be for a husband.

For Lent, I’m going to allow God to be the keeper of my heart that I know He already is. By making GOD that love of my life, my life will be more ready to receive love.  I won’t have the need to give my love away if I’m giving it to the One who deserves is more than any man.

-Madalyn Payge <3

“The LORD is my portion; I have promised to keep Your words” –Psalm 119:54

Links and Information

For those of you who have been asking, here are the links that you can find more about the organizations I will be affiliated with:

http://www.rcenterprises.org/ :
This is where I will be working this summer! On the home page of this site, you can read all about RCE and what their vision is. You can also click the link "Darius House" and find out more about the children I'll be working with and how to donate towards helping these abandoned children who have special needs.

http://globaloutreach.org/ :
This site will lead you to information about my missionary sending agency. Here, you can learn about all the different countries and people groups Global Outreach serves and also about their missionary families and how you can contribute to their missionary opportunities.

Madalyn's Mission

To all my family and friends,

I am excited to share that I have been accepted by Global Outreach International of Tupelo Mississippi, to serve as a Short Assignment Missionary to Romania, in Eastern Europe, this summer. While going through the processes of paperwork and applications, I have felt God leading me towards an opportunity much larger than I could have fathomed. Let me first share how God has worked in my life over the past year and how He has led me to make this decision.

I began working fulltime as a life coach at Walton County ARC Center after graduating from high school in June 2011. My job is to serve people with special needs and disabilities in helping them become more independent individuals. The experience I have gained over the last eight months has been life changing.  Each day my clients teach me more than I can ever hope to instill in them.  I have learned to look at life and people from a new perspective. God has given me a “new heart.”  I now am fully aware and know in my heart that all of God’s children are perfectly created by a loving, sovereign God; He has and does design each of us for ‘His’ purposes.

After working as a life coach all summer, I started my first semester of college in August 2011 with a heavy heart. I continued working full time at ARC, and my passion for people with special needs grew more intense; something inside me was quickly changing. One day during a class lecture, my professor spoke very briefly about disabilities, how they affected people in all countries and that not everyone has the same resources and facilities we have in America. For two months I prayed fervently, asking God how I could help or work with people with special needs and disabilities that live in other countries.

In October, God opened a big door for me as I learned about a place in Romania that needed volunteers who were trained to care for children with special needs. It was a great joy to also learn that the facility was Christ-centered.

My next step was to make a trip to the home of Global Outreach International in Tupelo, Mississippi where I shared my desire to serve. I learned of a mission ministry opportunity that could not have been more perfect. I am now preparing to spend three months in Arad, Romania, where I will serve at Darius House‑‑ a full-time care facility for children with special needs. Global Outreach will be my sending agency. Global will partner with Romanian Christian Enterprises (RCE) who is the organization that established the Darius House ministry.

I must raise all the funds needed before leaving for Romania. Will you please be a financial partner in my first mission ministry? Round-trip airfare will be approximately $1,300. Living accommodations, meals, and transportation will be $50 per day.  I must also cover my personal financial responsibilities while I’m away ( i.e. rent, car payment, utilities, etc.).

Global Outreach will be my sending agency and will accept all gifts towards my summer mission. Global is unique in that one hundred percent of all funds raised by the missionary go directly into his or her ministry account and that all gifts are tax-deductible.

Preparing myself financially and spiritually for this trip has been rewarding and I am very excited about what is to come.  Being so young, this is a big opportunity, however, I am confident in the abilities and gifts God has given me and it is my desire to use them for His glory. Please pray that hearts will be touched to give that I may meet my budget for the three month period.     

Seeking to honor HIM,
Madalyn McCombs